“experiences pile up/rewind/I call them back…”
Another calendar year passes; another cycle of the seasons as the light returns with each day. January 22 is a winter full moon and so the cycle continues!
So many new and exciting happenings in my life have occurred! I dedicated December to friends and family as so many do. Isn’t that a wonderful tradition? It’s very rewarding when one finally learns to let go of the pressures and enjoy the present with good food, warmth, holiday lights, and flickering candles shared with those you care for and have known forever or with new acquaintances.
Some good news: I have been awarded a modest grant from the local arts council to compile my 20 plus years of poetry and to record a CD of combined spoken word spiced up with my flute solos! Isn’t that lovely? Now, to find the time… I will focus on poems exploring heritage, stories of my ancestors–real and imagined, based on an early collection: China Baby.
Always at this turn of the wheel we meditate, contemplate on our lives. Some make resolutions; others do not. We tend to mark changes by holidays, special occasions, birthdays, but really, life is a continuum. And, I find, when I experience life as a continuum, I feel less frantic, less concerned about the passing of years, the passing of time.
Still, a life unexamined is, a life unlived and I do reflect upon life’s experiences, calling them back: “rewind.” My life, my mother’s, her mother’s and beyond…
Here’s a poem from the collection. I hope you enjoy.
Painting: “Full Moon in Winter,” Acrylic on canvas panel, 9 x 12, copyright 2007, Jacquelyn Markham .
Photo: “China Baby,” b & w, taken and developed in the old way by, copyright 2000, J. Markham.
China Baby
The rotten egg smell of paper mills excited me,
Manistee and Grandma’s house.
After Grandma’s marshmallow skin hug
came the china baby in a peanut shell, tied with a ribbon,
untouchable in the china cabinet till Grandma brought it down.
In later years, I remember her in a dining room spread with yellow light
oak table piled with newspapers, post cards, and anything too good to throw away.
She said rosaries and read Polish prayers, Piesni Postne for the poor.
I heard when she was young, she washed and stretched
other people’s lace curtains, ironed organdy dresses for children not her own,
and stemmed black cherries at the canning factory.
No one talked about what happened to Grandpa
who left her and six children without a word.
She must have searched in every stranger’s face
for the features in that oval portrait
hanging in the closed off room upstairs.
They sold her house to pay the bills of dying,
belongings sorted like a tug-of-war.
Mother said what’s the use. After grandma’s routine caretaking,
no one puts flowers on her grave.
Now, the china baby is in my china cabinet
and my sister’s child peeks in with envious eyes.
Jacquelyn Markham©2007
Rose wrote:
What a wonderful way to celebrate the new year Jackie. Congratulations on your grant which you’ve been rewarded.
Little child, does she have blue eyes like her Mom. Rosaries and Polish prayers…sounds so familar…not Polish just Irish….no flowers on graves.
Keep those China Babies coming…the photo is absolutely beautiful…
Posted on 19-Jan-08 at 12:24 pm | Permalink
Jacquelyn Markham wrote:
Thank you Rose for your comments and for dropping in so quickly after my post hit cyberspace!
The photo is the real China Baby, a little kewpie doll of sorts, who is probably 60 plus years old. I took the photo when I published a chapbook around 1989, I believe and developed it in the darkroom before digital images were in my consciousness anyway!
The little child peeking in now has children of her own, so the cycle continues.
So much wrapped up in that “peanut shell tied with a ribbon.”
PS I posted two newer poems under the Poetry Page. Check them out when you have time.
Posted on 20-Jan-08 at 12:59 am | Permalink
Susan Madison wrote:
Hi Jacquelyn,
It’s lovely to honor the people in our lives and not let our lives control us. We so often get wrapped up in December activities that we get overwhelmed. Good for you. I shall try to honor your new tradition by spending quality time with the folks I love.
Susan Madison
Posted on 26-Jan-08 at 8:09 pm | Permalink
Jacquelyn Markham wrote:
Susan,
It’s a wonderful tradition: spending time with the “folks” we love and remembering our heritage in little ways: recipes, photographs, poems, stories, holiday ornaments, and the memories we can pass on to those younger than us.
I invite you to post some of your writings here. Come one, come all!
Thank you for your thoughtful response.
Jacquelyn
Posted on 26-Jan-08 at 10:04 pm | Permalink
Bonnie wrote:
Jacquelyn,
I love your poetry. I used to know a Jackie Markham who lived in Havana, Florida. Your poetry reminds me a lot of hers. She wrote wonderful poetry and took beautiful photographs.
Posted on 08-Mar-08 at 9:30 am | Permalink
Jacquelyn Markham wrote:
Bonnie,
It is I!! I still write poetry and I now paint more than take photographs.
Thank you for your memories of my work and for visiting and posting on my website.
So good to hear from you.
Do you recall the “October” poem? It was written right there in the little cabin in Concord so many years ago. “Experiences pile up…”
Posted on 08-Mar-08 at 11:37 am | Permalink
Bonnie wrote:
Jackie,
I can’t believe I finally found you. I have been searching for you on and off for years.
I recently found a slide of a photo that you took of me one afternoon in that little “cabin in Concord,” and I had it enlarged. The sun was going down and you caught the light just right.
I would love to catch up with you sometime.
Bonnie
Posted on 09-Mar-08 at 12:57 pm | Permalink
Jacquelyn Markham wrote:
Bonnie,
It’s wonderful to know that a photograph I took years ago is still important to you. I can’t wait to see it again.
I am working on compiling my poetry now and a project I have in mind is to exhume my photographs, maybe create some collages from them. Who knows what ideas may come about?
I have some great old photos pre-digital–from the darkroom of old black and white film. I miss the experience of watching the photograph emerge on a blank sheet of photograph paper floating in the developer. That is truly a miracle!
Thank you for your comments!
Posted on 10-Mar-08 at 10:26 am | Permalink